Self Help for Mums
While we understand you should seek medical help and assistance if you are feeling you have reached a point that you can no longer cope with every day life.
We have included some things to try to pick yourself up a little bit in the mean time if you are waiting for interventions as the waiting times can be long and you need some support and suggestions NOW!
You could try some of these little steps to feel better in yourself, to help you tackle the bigger issues without medical interventions.
Please bare in mind there are so many different emotions and thought processing paths to understand, to gain an idea of why you are feeling a certain way. But once you find some answers, you can start to progress to feeling better.
What every new parent should know – Click Here >>>
There is nothing better than nice warm bath to help you relax, help the body to soothe and heal and relax muscles and joints. You could try adding your favourite scents in shower gels or aromatherapy oils or room spray to give your sensors a boost. Some of our favourite bath products are listed below.
Bath and Shower Products
Candles have the ability to give our brain a visual example of being present in the moment, giving us something to solely focus on to tune our brain into the present and giving your body time to stop and relax. Candles can be great for aromas to so invest in a nice aromatherapy candle can add to the experience. This are perfect to use around the bath, turning the main bathroom light off and creating your own little sanctuary.
Candles and Room fragrance
Music can soothe our soul, I am sure you already have favourite music and music you like to listen to in your car maybe, or your favourite radio station , but I am talking more about relaxation music, which might take you a little while to get use to, it might feel a bit fluffy to start with but it really will trigger your brain into deep relaxation. It could also help with settling your baby. This could be incorporated into your every day life, when you are in the house or car you can play some relaxing music and it will help you and baby feel calm.
Here are our top picks for relaxation music. They are on Spotify which you can download for free with adverts playing between songs or you can pay a small fee to get the add free version which i recommend as Music can be incorporated in every day life, wherever whenever.
Aromatherapy is widely used to treat a lot of body aliments and mental issues. it can treat you emotionally, mentally, spiritually. It is based on the theory of Aroma can trigger your brain to feel a certain way. This is such a good and easy one to incorporate into your every day life. Here are a few examples of how you can use aromatherapy oils.
. a few drops in the bath
. a few drops in a room defuser
. a few drops on a Aromatherapy bracelet to inhale regularly
. a few drops on your pillow just before bed.
. diluted in a room spray
. diluted in a massage oil such as coconut oil (my favourite)
plus so many more ways I am sure you can use your imagination with this one.
Please Note – Essential oils are not to be used neat onto the skin.
Here is an interesting video about the use of aromatherapy for you and your baby.
Please note: some of our information is from Blossom and Berry which is the Nurture University I trained with , and I have full permission to share them with you.
If you would like to find out more information on which ones can be used during pregnancy and postnatally check these out. We love them !
Lets face it exercise might not be the fore front of your priorities with a young baby but it is a good way to help your body calm down. When we exercise we release endorphins which are feel good hormones. This can help both our physically body stretch and warm our muscles but also help our self mentally. This could be as simple of walking with the pram for 30 mins a day while baby sleeps, going to a buggy fitness class to join other like minded Mums, attending a baby yoga class to incorporate some gentle body movement. There are also so many videos online with tips and techniques you can use in your own home if you don’t feel like going out one day.
Here are a few videos that we have found useful.
NHS Postnatal Yoga
Yoga with Adrianna ( we love this one because she does pre and postnatal as well as normal yoga you can do for years to come)
This one is a simple yet effective one. This can be done anytime anywhere. Deep breathing exercises give your body permission to relax and stop and focus for a second. This one is effective as babies pick up on how their care givers are feeling so if you are calm and relaxed so will your baby. Conscious breathing exercises are the quickest way to relax , calm down and slow. This is also a great way to start if you are feeling overwhelmed and frustrated, this is the start for a few minuets then you can calm down enough to decide how to move forward.
This app helps give you calming techniques including breathing.
This is a great App to use during Pregnancy and Postnatally to track progress and self help.
This one is more of a preference, but I personally find this super helpful if yo have a lot on your mind and find it difficult to concentrate. This doesn’t have to be written down in a certain way or in any order, its more about getting your thoughts out of your head and on to paper. They might be thoughts of ideas you need to use in the future but It could also be just something you need to get out of your head and never think about again. I suggest treating yourself to some lovely stationary and use them to look after your thoughts and then you head will have more space to think and function.
This could also be used as a gratitude journal, This is when you right down daily everything you are grateful for. This helps to get your mind into a positive mindset.
Here is a link to our favourite Stationnary.
On a slightly different note this brand also does some Baby Items that are just too cute not to mention. check them out here.
Online Help for mental health
As you know we are a big advocate of online courses as they are just so convenient and accessible when you want them. So this also applies to online CBT or Counselling courses. As someone who has been through counselling and having done a qualification too I understand the basics of how it works. Therefore I believe sometimes talking openly to someone can feel pretty intimidating and raw. But if you feel you would like to talk to someone about your mental health then please do so , don’t leave it and leave it, speak to a GP asap. However if you think you could benefit from working on your own problems and mindset on your own then try a online CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) course as this can be a huge help to get things straight in your mind and work your way through your though process without having to over share if you don’t feel you can or want to.
Here is a good website to find the right course for you.
There is also a good website with some self help sheets to work through.
App to help with mindfulness
Fundamentals of Self Care –
There are a few fundamentals I believe help when you are trying to relax and recover. so i wanted to share with you the main key fundamentals.
This is my biggest area of expertise and my passion. Skin to skin touch is a basic human need and we crave it without realising it sometimes, therefore it is so important for baby to have skin to skin contact often throughout the day and night but also as Mums we crave skin to skin either from our partner or our Babies. Here is my video on the benefits of massage therapy and why touch is so important.
Which ever shape or form noise comes in it can make us feel sad, happy, emotional, uplifted, calm. every emotion we feel can be triggered through music and sound. One of my favourite sounds is humming! babies can also find the sound of there mothers voice soothing, singing and humming are the best sound for a new born baby. It doesn’t matter if you feel self conscious when you first start doing it, it will soon come natural and really help the bonding process. Babies also love the sounds of natural and unusual things which we call white noise which can be the hoover or water running or the sound of a fan, it works on a theory that sound helps focus our attention and allows our mind to relax and think of nothing else but the sound. My point is that we think about baby but we don’t necessarily consider our own feelings towards sound. So I would love for you to consider what sounds or music you like and listen to them daily to help you feel more calm.
I am sure you have al heard of the sleep when baby sleeps and this isn’t often the easiest thing to do. But sleep is so important for the body to function, as no sleep effects every single body function. Here is a video all about sleep and tips on what you can do.
When you are looking after a new born baby you need all the strength you can get, which includes nutritious meals. Not only are you looking after a baby you are also recovering from birth which also requires you to replenish the lost vitamins and nutrient baby took with them when they left your body. I understand none wants to over indulge in salad when they have had no sleep but just being aware of what you are eating and how eating healthy can help with your mindset and physically health.
Also being conscious of reaching for the coffee because you are exhausted, but actually Coffee can be the devil because it can speed up the blood which usually end in you feeling like you are up high then crashing back down ready for your next coffee. But on a more serious note coffee can make anxiety and depression worse so its best to try and drink decaf or fruity tea instead. to help your body rest and stay on a level.
Inspiring Mums to Follow:
Stacie Solomon – Famous for X factor and Loose Woman , Mum to 3 children and keeps it real.
Giovanna Fletcher – Married to Tom Fletcher from Mcfly she works a lot in the postnatal world , discussing her own children and births.
Siobhan Miller – Positive Birth Company , Hypno birthing instructor, just because she is super funny and lively, nice to listen to.
Blossom and Berry – Baby massage and Baby Yoga experts.
The Unmumsy Mum – the title says it all, she is a well known author in all things mum related.
Jennie Harrison – birth trauma work , posts a lot of videos on Instagram worth watching.
Aine Homer – baby reflux lady with lots of experience in baby reflux and has a book published.